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Things Mitt Romney Could Talk To Bruce Rauner About While In Illinois

Mitt Romney will be in Chicago this afternoon as part of Paul Ryan’s book tour, where the two can reminisce about that time they lost Illinois by 17 points en route to a landslide defeat two years ago. Perhaps while Mitt is in town, he should take some time to talk to his political doppleganger, Bruce Rauner. After all, the two would have SO much to talk about, like:

  • How annoying it is when the public demands to see your tax returns
  • What a lovely place the Cayman Islands is for stashing millions to avoid paying US taxes
  • How hard it is to keep track of your net worth once you pass the first couple-hundred million
  • What is “touch” and why do people keep saying we are so “out of” it? (HINT)

And this is only the tip of the golden iceberg. So we truly hope that Romney has time to step away from Paul Ryan’s “Ideas That Already Lost A National Election Tour” to spend a few minutes with his unpolished understudy, Bruce Rauner.